Life as a roller-coaster

Well, hello.

It certainly has been a while. And a lot has happened. I like making lists so... list!

1. AS YOU LIKE IT. This is possibly one of the best things that's happened to me in.... well, a long time. I am so glad I was a part of it, especially because when I originally auditioned, I didn't really care for it because it was Shakespeare, I don't comprehend Shakespeare, and frankly, I didn't think I was going to get in - or at least get a big part, anyway. I was truthfully vying for a chorus role, but at one point I remember thinking, "Now wouldn't it be cool if I got a big enough role to be remembered?" And look how things work out. Fate is an odd thing. Or if fate doesn't exist, chance is the odd one.
Anyway. I don't think I've ever loved a show as much as I loved this one - except quite possibly Eleemosynary, but as much as that show impacted me as a person and a writer, I wasn't in that one. This one was just an ethereal, once-in-a-lifetime experience that I don't think I'll ever have again. The acting was brilliant, really pushed my limits, more than once made me cry and feel like dirt and wish I wasn't in it, but in the end, I'm glad I went through it. I would stand on stage every night and feel unworthy of acting in the company of such great actors and actresses. At times I had self-doubts, and really didn't know if I deserved to be up there or if the directors made a mistake in casting me, but I'm really glad with the end result. And the people were just lovely. I loved getting reacquainted with old elementary-school buddies that I never really talked to, or getting to know people I've been 'sort-of-friends' with all throughout high school better, or getting closer to my already good friends. On days we didn't have rehearsal, we'd sit there on the stage anyway, talking and bonding and complaining and eating and sleeping together (not like that, perverts). As You Like It holds a special place in my heart. I am so glad that whatever made me audition that day, well, made me do it. Because it seriously was one of the best times of my life. And I want to thank Shakespeare for making it possible, for the directors for believing in me and pushing me hard, for my friends and co-cast-members for guiding me and encouraging me when I quite literally felt like shit, for all the crew members for putting as much heart into it as we did (look at our beautiful set), for the musicians for playing lovely, beautimous music, and for everyone who came and saw it and enjoyed it for what it was. I had a few people ask for my autographs, and more than a few (including classmates!) tell me I was their favorite character.
I'm sad it's all over. There are few times in life you really experience being a part of something greater, of something big and truly incredible. Every night was breathtaking, all over again. I felt so powerful on stage, so much like someone else, so much like I was Celia Frederick (THE FREDERICK FREDERICKS!) Thank you all for making it so special. Thank you all.

2. Car troubles. Either I'm a crappy driver (which I'm not) or my car hates me, or I have the shittiest luck in the whole world with cars. In September, I got a flat tire the third day I got my license. Our spare tire was broken. I stayed in a parking lot of 7-Eleven for three-and-a-half hours. GREAT. In October, I was pulled over for turning left on a residential area on a shortcut to school that my parents always took and never got in trouble for. The one day I'm almost on time for school, and I get pulled over. Plus the cop took forever. Also, in October, some idiot driving in front of me when we were stopped at an intersection gets out of his car and checks his tires, and then his car starts rolling backwards. I have nowhere to go, and it of course bumps into mine. He drives off. Good thing my car has no damage.
Today. I was driving home from musical auditions and on Parker and Florida, I was going straight on southbound Parker and it was a green light, and I was going 45 mph (I checked). As soon as I hit the intersection it turns yellow, and then all of the sudden, this car starts to turn left onto Florida right in front of me. I wasn't distracted in the least, and as soon as I see her I furiously hit my brakes, but it's too late and I hit her on the side. I'm crying on the phone as soon as I call my parents. The first cop was a fairly young man, and he said that there were no arguments and the other driver was totally at fault, and don't worry, I'd be okay with no charges, etc. So then my mood gets sort of better, but then he says we have to wait for state patrol to do inspection, and then the state patrol cop lady gets here and she says I'M AT FAULT partially because I 'should have seen her turn before and braked earlier' because supposedly the other car had already passed 'four lanes of traffic' (there were only 2 lanes, go and see for yourself) so I should have seen her earlier. I got a ticket for 'careless driving'. $58, 2 points if I mail it in in 20 days. What. The. Fuck. I am so pissed off, I can't even tell you.
How the hell was I supposed to 'BRAKE EARLIER'? I slammed the brakes as soon as I saw that lady. Am I constantly supposed to expect people turning left in front of my nose when I have the right-away? And how is that careless driving? I could tell you my speed, I could tell you that it was a green light until I hit the intersection, I wasn't talking on my cell phone, my eyes were on the road.... what the fuck. I am furious beyond furious. Plus my dad got in a huge argument with her and we were there from 6:10 to 9:15 because she wouldn't change her fucking wrong mind. Plus the other lady changed her story for the state patrol cop and said I ran a red light. Outrageous, just damn outrageous. I HATE PEOPLE WHO FUCKING LIE.
And so I guess we're just waiting for the other lady's insurance to see if they'll pay for all the damage, and if not, then well, my parents say we're taking it to court.
This is discrimination. I am so pissed. If you can't tell yet.

3. Friendships, good times, cast party, Skyy. I am soo glad that I've made so many new ones this year! Mostly due to the play. The cast party was pretty much bomb, even though I really don't have any memory of it beyond running back to Emily's house holding hands with Kiri and Devin and giggling and going, "sidewalk, sidewalk, sidewalk, car, car, car, grass, car, sidewalk, eek! house!". The extent of my memory of that night is Stonehenge at school after the play singing songs like Part of Your World and I Will Survive with all the ladies, then going running at anonymous park, then going to Kemily's house for the cast party. At the cast party, I sat on the couch and talked a bit with Daren, then some boys started saying something and then Daren pulled me outside to Lissa's car but she disappeared. So there was Lissa, Haley, Kiri, Raphie, and me, and of course Skyy. It is nasty I tell you, it's like rubbing alcohol. So we had to pull around the block to a corner cuz Emily's neighbor came out and was looking sketch, so we acted like we drove away. And then we had to drive back for chasers, and shot glasses, and then we each had about 2 and then went back in for the boxer contest.
There was some rumor going about the guys wearing thongs this year, so all of us were grossed out, but the senior girls got to sit on the couch this time around! WOOT! I have been looking forward to this all 4 years. So then the contest commenced, and I was feeling a bit dizzy but then I was like this ain't bad. The boys were all wearing boxers, so phew, but then they took off their boxers too and they were wearing Marvel Comics BRIEFS under them and of COURSE they all stuffed! I basically got raped by Nick and Elias.
Skylar won, of course.
And then me, Daren, Chava, Devin, Kiri, and Lissa ran back out to her car and commenced to have more Skyy, and I think I had 5 in total, cuz I didn't feel anything in the car and I thought I could take more, so I did. Root beer saved my life from tasting like rubbing alcohol.
So then Me, Kiri, and Devin did the dialogue mentioned above running back to Kemily's house, and from there, I don't remember much else. This is what I've been told:

-I'm loud, obnoxious, giggly, repetitious, annoying, hilarious, rowdy, insanely cute, have a cute giggle, the polar opposite of my usual self... the list goes on
-I told everyone about 500 times that I had to go to church tomorrow (I kind of remember this... I think...).
-I had a conversation with Josh for awhile about something or other (he won't tell me what), and then I said I wanted and England wristband like his, and he said only if I wore it, and then I said I'd make him a Portugal jersey/wristband? out of rubber bands.
-I played with Pierre and Peter's glasses and told Peter I've always wanted his (?)
-Every time I looked at Ben, who was high off his ass, I giggled.
-Every time I looked at Daren, who was also quite gone, I giggled.
-Every time I looked at just about anybody, I giggled (I do remember giggling a lot).
-To prove I was sober, I commenced to trace people's letterings on their shirt. I did half of Elias's, which was Led Zeppelin's (apparently according to him I wasn't even close); Austen's, which I thought was 'DKNY' but was actually 'Oakland' (I remember that); Jerrod's Batman logo, except he wouldn't let me (I remember that too!); and Josh's, which was 'Spy', and that proceeded to make me giggle and point out to him every 5 minutes that he was a spy and that I was fascinated with it.
-When Alex tried to force-feed me water because it would make me feel better, I went, "I FEEL GREAT!" and threw up my arm and splashed water all over Emily's kitchen. 3 times, because Emily asked how that happened and I reenacted it for her. (WTF! No matter how hard I try I absolutely can't remember this at ALL, but EVERYONE'S been talking about this incident so I can't say they're all lying.)
-Jerrod told me I drank like a noob, so I told him he drank like a Jap, and then he told me his name was Vladimir cuz he drank like a Russian, so I called him Vladimir for a while.
-Joe kept trying to trip me, so once I went insane and started hitting him (again... wtf?! I have no memory of this in the least)
-I was waltzing with Nick at one point? (I kind of remember this, but my memory is of him teaching me to moonwalk...)
-I got halfway through my pizza (I remember eating pizza!) and didn't want it anymore so I started shoving it at people. Then it somehow disappeared (when re-telling this to me, Alex doesn't know what I did with it) and then I started asking where it was.
-Jerrod was trying to make me and Nick hook up because apparently 'Nick would thank him later'. (I have a bone to pick with him about that.)
-I told Jerrod what pecs are supposed to look like.
-Alex told me to place my finger on my nose to prove I was sober, so I did and I managed to place it on my nose, but after a few seconds it would start drifting towards my eye...
-Some conversation I was having with someone, my reasoning for Kiri being good at puzzles was 'because we're Chinese!' (nobody told me this, I remember it, but I don't remember who I was having the conversation with)
-I hugged everyone I saw.
-I think I ate Dem Bones (the candy) - and the candy wrappers - at one point (I remember this too, but I don't remember when I was eating them or where I got them from)
-I talked to somebody on Kiri's phone (I remember this too, but I don't remember what I told them)
-Somebody picked me up to get me to the door on my way home.

So then I remember driving to Lissa's house (IIII didn't drive) because my friends wouldn't let me go home in my state of being (OH! I REMEMBER CALLING MY DAD TO TELL HIM!) and then there were a bunch of people at Lissa's house when we got there and a lady showed us her mastechtomy, and some guy chewed his shoelace, and I told Lissa's mom she was drunk, and then I took a shower and fell asleep at 3:30 at her house. And didn't wake up till laaaaaate. I didn't even go to church.

4. Finals, end of 1st semester Senior Year, the Holiday season. It's been fun, guys. And I should be freaking about finals right about now... but I'm not? Serious senioritis going on. I just... I want to go to college, but I don't. I want to leave, but I don't. I want to start over somewhere where I don't have a clue who anyone is and start afresh with nobody knowing who I am either, somewhere where I can make fabulous new memories and new friends and new loves.... but I don't. I don't want to leave any of the people I've met, and I don't want to give up any of the experiences I've made, especially this year. I've grown so much, and I know it's time for me to move on and go venture on my own in the big bad world, but a part of me just wants to be little again, a little frosh girlie who can make these sacred friendships all over again. I love you guys.
Aand, since you love me too, this is my xmas list!
-anything cristiano ronaldo or portugal national team
-boyslikegirls concert tee
-cute is what we aim for concert tee
-final fantasy 7 (the game, yes)
-clothing items
-gift cards to anywhere
-this shirt (preview below:)



-a hatsuharu sohma stuffed animal
-ck pure poison eau de toilette (christian's getting this for me, I love you!)
-sour starburst, lots and lots of it
-anything harajuku lovers, specifically the 'I'm Just an Orange County girl!' harajuku lovers purse
-digital camera
-eragon tickets

I love you all.
...and I wouldn't have it any other way,
chen.